Since I have a mortgage for 13 Eddie Court, I need my mortgage provider’s permission to rent out the flat. I applied for this at the end of January, once I was sure of the names of the tenants. I’ve been checking on the progress of this application ever since.

However, the mortgage provider’s head office help-desk-bot tells me now they haven’t received the form. Their lettings department doesn’t take incoming calls so the help-desk-bot has emailed that department to ask them to contact me.

I’ve also contacted my mortgage provider’s local office: they can’t speak to the head office letting department either. However, my lawyer/rental agent has retained a copy of the application and is now trying to use it to beat ‘seven shades of shit’ out of the mortgage company via their local office.

Meanwhile my sister’s dealings with state agencies crawl on interminably. She’s been denied tax credits for 2003-4 and 2004-5 because she didn’t provide proof she’s still disabled. Because she’d already received these credits, the inland revenue now want them back: over £1500. The only consolation is I now know she can pay this.

Also, the Department for Work & Pensions now want to check up that she’s been looking for jobs assiduously enough. They’ve denied her JobSeeker’s Allowance for several months because Morrisons told them she’d resigned her job ‘for a change in career direction’.

Of course, Morrisons have yet to put their offer of reinstatement in writing. Their latest tale is that their lawyer doesn’t know whether the written offer should come from the lawyer or the HR department.