it doesn’t get any better does it?

When Mood Music
2006-02-04 17:49:00 discontent Barber’s Adagio For Strings Ferry Corsten Remix-William Orbit-Cream Ibiza

Last night mum was cooking tea when she started feeling nauseous: she sat on the sofa with a ‘puke bowl’, too nauseous to even drink water. We made various efforts to comfort her and I continued cooking (because mum was concerned that dad and Sue should eat). This was the first time I’ve even come close to cooking meat in over two decades but my only concern was that I cook it properly: the animal-rights issues didn’t even surface in my mind.

Mum eventually recovered enough to eat some toast so she could inject her insulin, then went to bed.

Around 3 am, I heard her waking dad up because she was feeling cramps in her legs and couldn’t move. He massaged her and eventually they went back to sleep.

This morning Susan received a letter from the Employment Tribunal. By now mum had recovered enough to start washing clothes. I saw her tremble and asked what was happening. She cried a bit and said that she ached all over* and suddenly no longer had strength, then made a visible effort to get going again. (I think she wanted to be seen to function normally so I made her some coffee and left her to carry on filing Susan’s guddle of papers.)

Susan and I scanned the Employment Tribunal letter on dad’s PC: Sue now knows how to make a ‘photocopy’ and I assembled the files into a PDF to email to her MENCAP advisor.

Mum and Sue are now shopping in town and I’m trying to decide what to do in relation to all of this. I’ve said to both mum and dad (separately, while the other was out of earshot) that I’m considering giving up my India trip. Dad told me that I must ‘live my own life’. Mum said that me not doing what I wanted so would make her feel even worse. This makes me feel even more apprehensive about going away!

*a combination of arthritis and her recent-ish car crash

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