Our wonderful hostess took us into town and then to a triplet of museums on Bygdøy peninsula. Medical issues and the number of people wandering around in the dark, overheated atmosphere may have led to me finding the Fram museum somewhat oppressive, although going onto the boat without first knowing why it was famous first may have contributed. I’m sure the museum has done a thorough job of preservation and presentation of information in non-native languages, but what’s the point when you can’t see it to read it?
I also managed to cause concern by following Elly or her doppelgänger into the next hall via an underground passage (which is meant to be used by visitors), thinking it was the way to the next museum. It wasn’t, and Elly and our host are adamant that they never entered this passage, and that they had to search both toilets for me.
By contrast to Fram, the ship museum next door was light so we could see the exhibits, and get a feel for the harshness of life at sea on tiny, very well preserved boats. Most of them were used for fishing, but I don’t see where the catch would have been kept. There was hardly enough space for the sailors.
The top museum, by my reckoning, featured Thor Heyerdahl’s Kon-tiki and Ra rafts. This hit me emotionally, as well as enabling us to get to close to the rafts I could begin to imagine life on boards: how much space and privacy there wasn’t. Then again, Kon-tiki and Ra were actually bigger than I’d imagined. I’m sorry if that doesn’t make sense to you but it does to me!
Here’s hoping the photos do some justice:
Nobel peace centreOn a ‘bus-boat’View astern from the ‘bus-boat’Another view from the ‘bus-boat’Another view from the ‘bus-boat’We sailed to Oslo on one of theseOutside the Fram museummap of Bogdøy‘person-cairn’What the ‘person-cairn’ Is aboutPolitical refugee from Easter island?About Kon-tikiKon-tikiKon-tikiRaRaRaLocal person-hole. I’m sure there is a story behind the design.Elly, our hostess, and a smelly old fart.
We arrived in Oslo about 10am, and were met by an old friend who is doing post-doctoral work in Oslo. She had been adamant that we would stay with her rather than in a hotel: she’d deliberately rented a house with guest-space when she arrived in Oslo in 2019, but then wegen des Coronas no-one could visit her. It was lovely to have time with our friend and her guidance around town was top-hole.
View of OslofjordView of OslofjordView of OslofjordView of OslofjordView of OslofjordOur cabin was very near the lifeboats – hooray!
Our friend took us through central Oslo, past the town-hall, to the national museum T-bane station (‘tunnel-train’ = ‘underground’, even though most of it is above ground), and then by train to her house in an uphill suburb in northwestern Oslo. After dumping our gear and catching up a bit – it’s been over 3 years since we last saw each other face-to-face – we went in search of the national ski museum, because we are in Norway and therefore north of the arctic circle. We found the municipal ski-jump – also used for the olympics, apparently – and people riding an aerial runway down it, but not the museum. I suspect its exhibits are so old that they and the building have crumbled to dust.
Around central Oslo Around central Oslo Around central OsloOslo town hall Oslo town hallOslo town hall Oslo town hall Oslo town hallFrieze around Oslo town hallFrieze around Oslo town hallFrieze around Oslo town hallFrieze around Oslo town hallOslo town hallOslo town hallOslo town hallI was grabbed by a Slovakian(?) couple, presumably because of my kilt. They had driven to Kiel, took the ferry to Oslo, and were about to drive to Trondheim to go fishing Oslo town hallView from Oslo town halll
We took the T-bane to the final stop on this line (Frognerseteren). Apparently this area was the summer pasture for the Frogner area in central-ish Oslo. We couldn’t see any animals grazing but found a lovely and popular restaurant selling (among many other nice things) vegan cake. Even better, my blood sugar was in a state where cake was welcome.
View of OslofjordView of OslofjordView of OslofjordSki-jumpSki-jumpTroll near the ski-jumpView from FrognersterenView from FrognersterenView from FrognersterenView from Frognersteren
After admiring the view and nattering for a while, we headed back to our friend’s house to cook jambalaya, eat, chat and crash out. (Our friend did most of the cooking, but I chopped vegetables and Elly was skivvy.)
Our first port of call, according to my photos, was to Swedenkai. This is on the west side of Kielförde (Kiel fjord), and Norwegenkai is on the east side of the Förde. Yet, last time I looked, Sweden is east of Norway.
So, yes, there was success! We cycled to the Hauptbahnhof, where Elly waited outside the Reisezentrum while I spoke in fractured German about our ticket needs. There were bike spaces on the train we wanted from Osnabrück to Amsterdam. So on Tuesday we will arrive in Kiel about 10am. Then we’ll take a regional train to Hamburg (1 hour 12 minutes), then an intercity train to Osnabrück (2 hours 30 minutes), then another intercity to Amsterdam (3 hours 7 minutes). So that’s 6 hours 49 minutes on Euro-bahnen, without smoking! You’ll probably hear the screams in Edinburgh. We then took a brief look at the Hiroshimapark, before heading to the ferry terminal. That was a slightly confusing ride, including a narrow bridge across the Förde.
Spider-pig in our hotel lobbyMarketing love? Where is Bill Hicks when you need him?HiroshimaparkHiroshimaparkWhat is old Bismarck-bollock-features doin in a peace park?And what has he got on his eyes?Local archtecture
When we got into the terminal, we were told to go to the front of the car-queue and shelter from the elements under the concrete roof next to the check-in gates, because cycles and motorbikes would be boarded first. However, the check-in person then told us that the captain had decided to to board other vehicles first. So we stood and got very cold for an hour. Our reward was being able to cycle onto the ferry.
The ship itself is crazy. Imagine a vey posh version of the shops you are forced to go through between check-in and gate at an airport, but with lifts from a colour version of Metropolis, rooms that are the same size as a budget hotel but as posh as a 5-star, all piled onto a ship as big as a major oil tanker, with superstructure so high you could bungee-jump from the bridge.
Elly observing chocolate cake.Promenade in our shipPromenade in our shipPromenade in our shipPromenade in our shipThe ship was so posh, the maps were 3-D.
As we set off, we watched progress from the forward observation-lounge. We were tempted on deck for cigarettes (well I was) and to watch as we passed under the Nyborg-Halsskov (‘Great Belt’)bridge. It’s truly magnificent, but I doubt my photos do it justice. By then, my blood-sugar was calling out for pizza. In addition to all the posh shops and restaurants, there was a pizza-bar selling (among other types) pizza with vegan cheese.
Oh no, we’re going to crashmany sailing boats in our wayKiel docksKiel ferry terminalentrance to the Ostseekanalentrance to the Ostseekanalentrance to the Ostseekanalentrance to the OstseekanalApproaching the Great Belt bridgeApproaching the Great Belt bridgeYou can tell how big the bridge is by the size of our wake. The Color Fantasy is 41.35 metres wide.
I think that after that we slobbed and blogged until our evening meal, a very plentiful buffet, and then crashed out. All that active travel is so tiring!
I spoke too soon in the last entry about getting into my stride. (Would cadence have been more appropriate?) The way from Neumünster to Kiel was mostly on tarmac cyclepaths (with occasional ‘drempels’ due to tree roots) but it undulated by a few meters quite often, and that was taxing. I’m also pretty sure I’m pedalling against some friction, despite Lev having been serviced not long before we left. (I blame the crap UK trains – no way were Lev’s handlebars squint before we left.) There were some patches of gravel en route, which had me singing something like Deutschland Deutschland ohne Wegdek mainly because Deutschland Deutschland ohne Straßenbeläge doesn’t scan.
We had a drinks-break at a lakeside café on the east of the Bordesholmer See. It night have been possible to swim in the lake (and the temperature made this tempting) but there was nowhere to change – there was a sign on the café door saying very strictly ‘this is not a changing room’ and I really didn’t fancy doing the last 10 miles in squelchy padding.
I seem to be getting into my stride just as we are getting towards the end of the cycling part of this holiday. My leg hardly hurts, although I still can’t do any uphill gradients over about 3% without dropping lots of gears. I feel I can do more saddle-time than I could before, and maybe could even get up the hill to Merchiston without screaming at myself for being crap.
The route today was mostly along tarmac cycle paths (again on the wrong side of the road) through multiple villages all called Kaltenkirchen, following a rail-line and listening to acorns crunching under tires, It’s still not entirely clear what surfaces can be cycled on in towns, and when the cycle-path suddenly re-appears on the other side of the road, getting to it isn’t obvious.
Lunch was at an Eis-salon in Bad Bramstedt. (We didn’t see the vampire’s bath, unfortunately.)
We got to our hotel quite early in the afternoon – so early it wasn’t yet ready – so we went to the nearby McDonald’s for cold drinks and to watch the real housewives of Neumünster-Sud smoke while their children played on a climbing frame/slide/plastic extrusion from the id of Doctor Zog. The umbrellas were also useful for sheltering from the rain for an hour or so.
Our insides thus hydrated and our outsides no longer in danger of externally applied hydration, we bumbled into the centre of Neumünster. It’s quite pretty, but alive and modern, with lots of people wondering about but none of the seediness I associate with bigger cities’ centres. Perhaps there should be a Gesetz: cities must be this size!
By the time we had wandered around the Teich in the centre of Neumünster, it was time to bimble back to the hotel, shower and change. (I’m still wearing the kilt.) Our 9-euro train tickets were valid on local buses, helping us head back into the town centre for dinner at Burgergallerie, watching people, Polizei and other fauna interacting. And yay, there were vegan burgers ad Fritz-Kola, so I may not sleep tonight.
The station square in Bremen wasn’t as noisy as last night. Occasional breaking of glass (possibly bottles) but few crowds. Bremen Hauptbahnhof was busy, with lifts that only just take bikes – and still people trying to cram themselves in when the lifts are clearly full.
We aimed to take the 10:33 ‘Regional’ (RE) train to Hamburg but that was horribly delayed, so we took a 10:58 ‘Metronom’ (ME) train. The main difference between the two that I can see is that MEs are painted pus-yellow on the outside. In one or two carriages there are ground floors with about 14 bike spaces. I guess that’s normally enough but with two or three trains’ worth of passengers it was seriously crowded. There were no openable windows, so we sweltered! I think I half-emptied my camel in only 90 minutes.
Leaving Hamburg was challenging for a moment because my phone was too hot to function – or so it told me. Even when it cooled enough to work, there was enough glare to make the screen invisible half the time. So I’m not convinced we’ve arrived in Hendstedt-Ulzburg by the most efficient route.
Actually, knowing Google Maps, we didn’t. If there is a cycle-path parallel to a road, GM will insist on the road. In Germany this may not be a bad thing because the majority of German cycle-paths (in my experience, which is obviously not a statistically significant sample) are made of lumpy brick. When there is tarmac, it has gaps filled with sand, and it’s on the left side of the road with no guarantee that if the road forks there will be a cycle path on the fork you want.
Hence I should have learnt this, or printed it on a maillot: Wenn Sie Radwege aus arschschmerzhaftem Kopfsteinpflaster auf der falschen Straßenseite und ohne Beschilderung bauen, werde ich die Asphaltstraße benutzen – und Sie können sich die Hupe in den Arsch stecken!
And here’s another one for big cities everywhere: Das stimmt! Park deinen vierrädrigen Todeswagen auf dem Radweg, du Wichser.
Anyway, we made a reasonable (for this trip and these conditions) pace northeast through Hamburg’s suburbs and dormitory towns. Lunch was in Norderstedt, just into Schleswig-Holstein. So we are in our final Land for this part of the trip! And it feels I could have cycled more, but there’s no point in going mad in this heat.
We needed to get a day in hand to be sure of arriving in Kiel in time for our ferry. Currently we can do about 20 miles a day before arse-ache, foot-pain, calf-cramps or blood-sugar stops it being fun. To be honest, I am pissed off with my blood-sugar for going suddenly low, despite filling up with low-GI breakfasts, or staying high no matter how much headwind we battle, then crashing early evening. Thanks goodness for half a pannier of glucose tablets and Clif bars.
Apart from a canal-side bridge which required some push to mount, today’s cycling has been fine. Very little headwind, no navigation problems, mostly smooth (dare I say Dutch-like?) tarmac and a coffee-stop just when it was wanted in Großwolde (Café Kuchenliebe Ostfriesland). If you are in the market for beans, potatoes and/or strawberries go there. Otherwise go there, drink cold drinks and enjoy a junior engineer-of-tomorrow playing in the sandpit.) This contrasts with yesterday: cyclepaths made of often-uneven brick, or staying on the road to avoid gefahrliches Berm or allergenic crops. Owwww!
So that got us to Leer. Now, why call a town ‘Empty’ or is it a bit of Frysk I don’t understand? (There are many!) Our plan was to get a train to Bremen, then take another to Hamburg. The ticket office at Leer was closed, along with much else in this sabbath-observing area, so we just bought tickets from a machine to get us from there (Leer) to Bremen. According to Deutsche Bahn’s website, the next train with bike spaces from Bremen to Hamburg would have departed around 6pm, dumping us in a huge and mostly unfamiliar city late in the evening.
But according to the first ticket office attendant I asked; there were no trains with bike spaces at all today.
Quick consultation with Elly, then try second attendant: there are no bike spaces on Sundays on regional trains to Hamburg, apart from one leaving Bremen’s other station (some distance away) after 10pm.
OK, what about tomorrow?
Buy a 9 euro ticket each: that will take you anywhere in Germany until the end of August, and buy a bike ticket for tomorrow. Trains are every half hour – get on when there is space!
So, all being well, we get to Hamburg tomorrow lunchtime. Then we’ll cycle to Henstedt-Ulzburg (about 20 miles). On Tuesday we’ll cycle to Neumünster (about 25 miles), and on Wednesday get to Kiel (about 21 miles) for the holy German trinity of Hans im Glück, Drogerie-Markt and Eco-Express Waschsalon – and our ferry to Oslo!
Our hotel is on a big square outside the main station. There are lots of people: a few obvious backpackers and other travellers, but mostly lots of people just sitting in groups, some looking down and out. A lot of people walking and drinking beer, and more smokers than I’m used to. One fairly inebriated bloke was hauled off by the Schupo* as we necked cold drinks outside the Übersee Museum. Cheap holidays in other peoples’ misery?**
Back to the hotel to flop for a bit, and then time for the first Hans im Glück*** of the trip. Now we are flopped out. It’s nearly 10pm and yet I’m dripping!
at Bremen, we got a luggage trolley to move our kit to the hotel roomWater-spray on each table at Café KuchenliebeView of BahnhofsplatzOutside the Übersee museumBerlin Wall memorialBerlin Wall memorialBerlin Wall memorialNachspeisen!Germany seems to take more COVID precautions: masks on trains, hand sanitiser everywhere, and social distancing
What Elly said, with the addition that I slept for two hours when we got to the hotel. We then staggered to Kim and Kim for dinner. (You can see into it through glass doors in our hotel corridor but need to go out of the hotel to get there: Rauchenpause!) It’s cooler now, but still too hot to go under the duvet.
My legs are doing far better than I feared, but not as well as I’d hoped. However my arse is the main casualty stopping me doing the 35 to 40 miles per day we’d have needed to average. (Then factor in places to stay!) So tomorrow, we **hope** we can cycle to Leer, then get a train to Hamburg. It seems that there are plenty of trains but no bike spaces until late in the day. Ach wie schade!
Today was a good day, with stops at Hoogezand and Muntemdam. I’ve been quite dozy all day, so mile after mile of smooth path and little thinking were welcome. Having said that, the first stretch was very dozy: Hoogezand’s coffee got me going. By contrast, it was the last stretch that gave Elly foot-pain.
We crashed out for a while at our hotel, then wondered around Winschoten for food (Subway), then sat in the town park eating and plotting where to go next. On the walk back to our hotel, we encountered this: https://www.tracesofwar.com/sights/24236/Jewish-Memorial-Winschoten.htm. Unspeakable thoughts.
Digital evidence that Bruce might have a life 